Thursday, October 29, 2009

I'd rather be mother Theresa than marilyn monroe

Well...its official I'm no longer a poddie. I'm now a member of gold #1. Pods were our temp teams which lasted a little longer than normal because of our leaders sacrificial service in America Samao. Go NCCC! This past weekend was probably the best weekend I've had in awhile especially since joining. Saturday kicked it off. Bright in early all Americorps NCCCers were bussed to a sacramento theater where we met the mayor who snapped a few photos gave us a speech (unimpressed). He along with the govinator have dubbed the fourth saturday of every octo er "Make a Difference Day." our focus for the day was the large homeless population of Sacramento. In thw theater we listened to a board of experts including a gent who spent years on the streets. I was touched; I'm already thinking about how I can translate this feeling into action in. Des Moines. That's really a huge reason I'm here. Obviously to help here but also to take things back to my classroom and home.
Our project was at the womens's empowerment shelter. This program is one I can really get behind. Women who are already homeless or on their way to homelessness can enroll in this eight week program which gives them job training, interview skills, anger management and most importantly support to get up and out of their situation. They are in session 38. The walls of the front office were covered in bios of the women and then what has become of them since the program. The walls were literally covered with women of all ages colors and personalities, but so many of them shared commonalities- abuse, drugs, sex and the loss of a loved one most commonly a child. It broke my heart.
The project most included organization and boxing and transporting donations. The building has a back room which was full of piles and boxes and many many MANY clothes. It was fun to go through the clothes there was everything from retro chic to retro trash cute contemporary and 90 power suits lol. With all that taken care of the women can focus on their program instead of their mess.
After we returned I finally got to cook! I made poppy seed chicken, apple salad and asparagus. Joe ended up coming into the kitchen. We hung out and he helped with apple salad. When we served dinner everyone was there (except cam who had a hot date). Afterwards almost the whole team headed to the bar. We hung out and talked and laughed. The next day Sam and I plus some of pod 21 went into sacramento. It was a pretty sunday of strolling and ice cream. I had a great time and we got back just in time for some of justins awesome grilling. We plabned our trip as a pod into san fran the next day. After dinner we had a meeting which turned into something both traumatic and tragic.
At the end of the meeting we were all handed paper slips. Our pod had all different ones and suddenly we knew it was time to part. Sarah and I started crying her harder when she realized she was the only one with her clue. There were five of us in search of the "rocket" which turns out to be a playground. Sam, joe, cam, andretta and I were now gold team members while the real of our pod was blue green and silver. Upon reaching the rocket we realized that most of the people we didn't want including the only team leader I didn't like and every other team leader was in samao. They didn't give us our teams then but rather made us wait til the next night.our trip to san fran was cancelled bc both our paddies who drove had training and we had a corps wide dinner. The sun set fast on my good mood. We called a 911 pod meeting to encourage each other cry and hug. Afterwards justin and I ended up stargazing and talking. I was so cried out by night.
Monday gold stil had the day off so sam and I plus a few went to the aero space museum which was neat button san fran. We took another scavenger hunt to find our teams that night.
Cam and I actually ended up on gold one together along with sara who I met in minute (a different then my poddie sarah). Our team is different there is much less laughter and sarcasm and barely any ball busting. I feel like I'm constantly censoring myself but this is it. These are my teammates this is my family. Everyone is hesitant right now and I keep saying it will get better. I'm hopeful even when I lack faith. Right now it feels like well tolerate each other but not be crazy for one another. I'm nervous and achy over it.
Today (thurs) gold is headed to camp menedcino for service projects and team/unit bonding. Its in the redwoods and going to be beautiful and cold! Yay! Maybe it will finally sink in that I'm in california when I see the redwoods.

I may not get to post this til I get back but I'll def give you an update when I return.
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Friday, October 23, 2009

IMG00109-20091023-1405.jpg

The never ending training meetings are taking a toll
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Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Some pictures

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Poddies

So our pod may be non-permanent but I've grown really fond of them. We are all sassy and playful and every single person brings something awesome to the team. Tuesday morning was our physical training (PT) baseline and the realization that in the near future well be separated. This will also mean moving to a new room and a new roomie which will make me sad. Andretta is a riot and our personalities are both similiar and different. I'm nervous about switching all this stuff. Will the new pod get my smart ass comments and have them in return? I hope....I couldn't handle a stone cold sally lol.

The baseline went okay. While I'm proud of how I did I wish I was better-that best was better. However I did crank out 37 'modified' push ups (as zach calls them). This is more than I've ever done in my life! Total! Go me! I ran the mile and a half in 1903. This was frustrating for two reasons. One my contact slid out and not wanting to loose it I tried to put it back in while running. Two we ran around six am which is still very dark and it was an awful fog. I was trying so hard to watch where I was going very fearful for my ankles and three....(I know I said two but a girl can change her mind right?).... I was THREE SECONDS past 19 (the lowest time category). I could have shaved off ten seconds....seriously. I think I'm going to suggest that they tell us time at the halfway mark.

Things are still boring. Certified in CPR AED disaster relief and first aid this week. Cranked out four pages of my story (see other blog) and tried to take up suduko. I need something....

And to the few of you rascals who have asked there are no romances brewing.


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Saturday, October 17, 2009

a quickie...

Hey hey hey!! I'm sure all of you back home have missed that haha. It has been a few days since I posted last, even though I was in here yesterday. I have been feeling a lack of words. its pretty much a bummer. I even have a fresh new journal but i haven't found my 'spot' yet.

Its been an overwhelming amount of people and information, but nothing I can't handle. I have a feeling I'm talking way too much but there are some awfully quiet people around. I'm going to try to shut my pie hole. Although I will say i'm SUPER proud to be a teacher, even though I have no students and I just want everyone to know.

Yesterday was eight hours of meetings SNOOZE.

Today was eight hours of work. YAY! Today we went out to Laurel Ruff School. This is a transition school for students with special needs. There are 110 students in the school total but we worked one on one with Frances, who heads up a program from 18-22 year olds. This is an awesome program and while wars over transition, integration etc are being waged at home over SPED it was nice to see a functioning awesome program and get to help! They have a garden in the backyard which they use sort of as a victory garden. We put in two new beds (concrete stones and raised beds) as well as weeded and took out a monstrous grapevine. The grapevine was probably the high light of my day because a bunch of us girls just went at it and were eventually joined by two fellas to tip it over and cut the roots. Dont worry it wasn't a feminist enjoyment more like a social, bonding enjoyment. Everyone on my team seems to be just as sassy as me..so yay!

Tomorrow it looks like some of us are going to be taking the light rail into sacramento. I hope I find some pomegranates! I'm still missing fruit and snacking etc but I feel good and I'm enjoying this a lot.

Love you all and I miss you!

PS sorry there are no pictures!

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Its official

It looks like this is my last post from iowa. Well here I am at the airport. I leave DSM in fifteen. I barely slept and when I finally did it was by accident and it made me late but here I am with relatively no set backs. I'm extremely nauseas and scared. Saying good bye to everyone was so hard - a few tears trickled out while hugging Daddi but that was expected. Its going to be so hard to leave mom. She's my best friend and most of the time she's the only one to get through my hard head. Kt didn't come this morning so we parted with another ill see you. I keep hoping someone will show up I'm doing americorps with. I'm so sensitive to alienation nd being left out that I'm praying fervently to fall in with some people soon.

Ill be seeing you iowa. Ciao!
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Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Um leaving on a jet plane....

Suitcase is weighing in around 47 and my carry on is about 20 plus my purse of course but I am packed! I probably could have been packed earlier this morning but I was so paranoid about forgetting things that I couldn't committ to being 'done.'

The wait has started.

eight hours til departure.

Eight more hours of not sleeping.

I'm so nervous.

Can't wait to see you guys out there!

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Monday, October 12, 2009

two days and a lot of good byes

As this weekend was one of my lasts I spent it with Jens. Ya'll know this thanks to the previous post but here is a sweet picture Emma and I took after I picked her up from grandmamas. I saw the girls this morning since they were here for co-op. Everyone was very sad about me leaving. They are goign to grow so much while I'm away. Will I?

Tonight I drove to Simpson in Indianola to say good-bye to my friend Sylvia. We have been friends for a long time. When I was a senior she was a freshmen and one of 'mine' lol. We hugged and talked in the halls and I tried to be there as much as I could for her and I absolutely adored her as a person. We even did a play together that year. While I was at college we kind of drifted apart but then last fall about this time we started talking again. Our friendship has grown from mere classmates to friends. I feel like she is my little sister. It was awesome to see her at college and it was great to be on a college campus again (I always get so sad about having graduated). We got some jimmy johns because we love sandwhiches and then went to the mall.

When it came time to leave we had like 12 super long hugs and lots of tears. I've been trying so hard to not say good bye but rather I'll see you soon; moments like that dont seem to matter much.

Tomorrow is a big day of packing. I'm not sleeping but Im' definitely eating (times I wished I couldnt eat when i was nervous instead of eating constantly). I know I'll only be gone a few months before I come home for christmas (fingers crossed) but mom and dad are going to be 1000's of miles away. My sister will be getting her permit at fifteen my brother will be turning 13, audrey will be 2.... and Mom and dad will be adopting all while I'm gone. Everything is going to change. I know I'll always have somewhere to come home to but it will be vastly different than the place I left.

tears for goodbyes,

nerves for hellos,

worries of tomorrow

and excitement for today.

This is huge.

Sunday, October 11, 2009

an obligatory post.

I know I should probably be posting something but the neurotic tendencies are taking over and I can't sit still. Its only 2 days til I fly out and I really cannot believe I'm doing this.

I went over to Jen's tonight to play some Mario on the wii and chill. The night ended with the girls refusing to let me leave. I had a seven year old on my left foot and a five year old on my right. They understand 'long time" but not "not too long." It's hard to explain. 10 months seems like forever but I know its not.

I feel unprepared - emotionally, physically, mentally. I dont know what to expect but expecting nothing is not my strong suit. I want to prepare. I want to have a plan and I need some sort of security....but as one of my favorite quotes goes.....

*“Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure, or nothing.”

Wednesday, October 07, 2009

Give up the ghost

Good morning!
While I am at work I felt like I should share this with you. Brandi Carlile's Give Up the Ghost and Mayday Parade's Anywhere But Here came out yesterday and of course I had to buy them right away. Brandi's new cd was much more important than the other but I have been dying for some new music.


Give Up the Ghost has a little different sound then The Story. It has a fuller music feel with the piano and violins etc, but there are still awesome acoustic songs and her voice is melodic and divine as usual. I am not a huge fan of "Caroline" but I think it will probably grow on me. Her music just makes me feel good. I also downloaded "Creep" live in Boston. Its a good song and she does it so much justice. Love her although not nearly as much as my bestie kt.

Mayday Parade's cd is pretty good too. There was much concern as to how it would sound considering one of the vocals departed from the group but I am not disappointed in the purchase. I went ahead and bought the bonus version for the music videos etc. I think I would be listening to this much more if I wasn't listening to Give Up the Ghost on repeat.

Tuesday, October 06, 2009

Round one of packing.

Alas, I have resigned to some tediously tiresome tasks of packing. Tomorrow I need to ship my package UPS in order for it to get there on the 13th (the day before my grand arrival). I"m beginning to feel like there is not enough room in the world to make me feel comfortable about this packing extravaganza. I'm not going on vacation. I'm not just traveling for fun. I am MOVING, literally moving across the country and in theory I'm taking one suitcase and one box. I have decided to pick 'favorites' as far as clothes go but I didn't let myself take dresses or skirts.

DIGRESSION:

I'm kind of feeling like I may be out of place. While i LOVE getting dirty -I farm, I play sports, I enjoy working on cars (even though i dont know how) i like woodworking and learning new things. I have NEVER shyed away from something bc it could get me, or my clothes, dirty. BUT I love dressing up. I make up. Do my hair up. I love heels, skirts, blouses, sweaters, jewelry and while nothing is better than wearing sweats around the house I firmly enjoy dressing up. I'm bringing one skirt but not bringing any dresses and I'm very sad. .

END DIGRESSION:

I'm also struggling with shoes. I know, I know. All you gents can laugh but ladies...do you hear me? So in the NCCC suggestion list it says to bring dress shoes BUT are BDU's are black and brown which would require black AND brown dress shoes, but then there are heels (which i live for) and closed toes. I have flats but they are patterned so does that count? AHHH. I really can't afford to buy new things when I get out there. Especially if I just have it already at home which is why I think I'm compulsively overpacking.

I'm actually getting excited now. I'm so glad that I'm doing this. Its hard to not be in the classroom. I miss putting together units and skimming through texts for silly things like metaphors and similes. I miss the laughter and the respect that a room full of students can give you. I miss the challenges that a room full of students can give you. I hope that the next ten months can give me tools for my 'teachers toolbox' and that I'll be an even better teacher when I come back. But.......

I'm a forward thinker. When I was in jr high i was planning high school and when I was in high school I was planning college and when I was in college I was planning my life after and then suddenly in my very last year at college I make a random decision to apply then in my very last MONTH 2 weeks til the very end of college I get accepted and now...what? I'm trying to plan life after the corps but it seems dim and scary. I won't be back til the very end of July most schools are interviewing in april-may not the end of july almost almost. It's going to be a dire situation and/or an emergency that gets me a full time teaching job next fall. BUT so much can change. This program is sponteniety at its finest and I'm in it for that. People could change, hearts could change, lives could change and I can't plan based on everchanging. That fact is throwing me off and I think at a whole what I'm mostly terrified of.

On a family note Paiges birthday was last weekend and we were at jenni's all day on sunday.....

peace out...best friend 911.

Friday, October 02, 2009

new blog stumblings

This evening I stumbled across a blog, which led me to another blog which led me to an etsy store which led me to love. haha. We know how I get about such things. I found all of these things because I traipsed into the wonderful world of "Our Designed Life." Let me first say Happy Birthday and congratulatins on the wedding to Monica!

Blog #1 -->

My attraction to her blog comes from the idea is that it looks and feels a lot like mine. Obviously this is more professional and put together than this old ratty tatty thing BUT she actually talks about her stuff for more than a few words! So many blogs are just pictures or links which is wonderful BUT I want to know the blogger, I want to know why he/she blogs the content he/she does. I personally adore the post about shelves. I have such a fondness for shelving units and these are truly unique and functional! I'm incredibly partial to #...okay I can't pick, but I really tried! I also feel like I'm having a conversation with her. I know why she posted about shelves, what she likes and also she gave me some rather cordial tips! LOVE IT!

I could REALLY let the logorrhea flow and pretty much just write about all of her posts and her etsy finds but I have another blog/shop to mention and MUST get some sleep.

Blog #2+Etsy -->

I absolutely adored the blog. Oh, Hello Friend is a colorful and crisp page. The site really made me feel uplifted and cheery. I was especially drawn to this "Inspire: lovely" post. So many of the images seem to fit perfectly into my tastes.


I haven't really posted anything recently about Etsy finds lately, which to be honest has been because I have been trying to save as much as I can for Cali and we all know that as soon as I get on Etsy i have no monies left! I mosied on over to Hello Friends shop and of course fell in love. I put the purse away before i clicked but seriously!

I found this gorgeous locket. I absolutely love the color on the front and the locket aspect! Although I already have one I NEVER take off this one is calling for me.







She also has the most beautiful hair pins (which with my new haircute {yes hair...cute}) and buttons. Erg. I'm in love. Everything is so colorful and clean. Like little tiny pieces of personality! None of it is gawdy or ostentatious but delicate and simple while definitely getting a quirk across.





I definitely was thinking that the umbrella pendant was my favorite but the lovebirds have won entirely, without question. How glorious are they?

Send your love to these hard blogging ladies! :)

Sleep sweet I'm crafting and making lefsa tomorrow!

...from my phone?!

So after yesterdays iowa student loan disaster, I have been seeking solace in my blackberry (who I feel like I should name since we are rather intimate). Today I discovered logging from my phone! ) YAY! But had to go back to work before exploration could begin.

This evening I watched Doubt (I don't think he did it) with my parents and then.... GOT MY FLIGHT INFO! I fly from des moines at 8 am on wed the 14 and layover in phoenix where I am flying with two (so far) other ladies and we arrive in SAC at noon. I could puke my life away right now? Too much? Well I am nervous!
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